Infected Tube

What is a rant?

intransitive verb
1 : to talk in a noisy, excited, or declamatory manner
2 : to scold vehemently

transitive verb : to utter in a bombastic declamatory fashion

In that spirit, we at Infected Tube have put together this classic collection that we’re calling The Best Rants Of All Time Caught On Video

When Michael Jackson passed away, and the media fawned over the recently deceased, one belligerent little Congressman decided that he had had enough – “Congressman Pete King feels that we should be honoring the good men and women of our country who have dedicated their lives to helping others and serving our country not Michael Jackson.” OK. Sure.

In this infamous clip, Christian Bale absolutely flips his shit on the set of Terminator Salvation when a member of the crew interrupts the deep concentration that playing such a serious role in a work of art such as Terminator Salvation requires:

Once upon a time there was an Inside Edition anchor named Bill O’Reilly. Today he’s the leading voice of Fox News, and sometimes goes by the name of Papa Bear. But many years ago, he had a run-in with a teleprompter that shook him to the core. Without further adieu, let’s do it live!

On the topic of Papa Bear, Stephen Colbert unearthed some more footage of this infamous meltdown:
A couple years ago, Alec Baldwin decided that he had taken enough crap from his ‘rude thoughtless pig’ of a 12 year old daughter. So he left her this voicemail:

In this infamous clip that somehow found its way off the set of I Heart Huckabees, actress Lily Tomlin and director David O. Russell unload on each other:

When Dennis Green, then coach of the Arizona Cardinals, watched his team let a victory over the bears slip away, he lost his cool. To think, the Bears were who they thought they were, and then…they let them off the hook:

Denny Green isn’t the only football coach who list his shit during a post game press conference. When a reporter asked Jim Mora about the possibility of the playoffs for the Colts, he was, well, befuddled. The classic rant was later immortalized in this Coors Light Commercial.

Rick Santelli, reporting for CNBC from the pits of the Chicago Mercantile Exchange, rants about…homeowners defaulting on mortgages…tea parties…who knows. America, Fuck Yeah!

When MTV didn’t give Kanye West the awards that the autotuned Gay Fish felt he was entitled to, well that was just too much:

You don’t need to be a celebrity to record a world famous rant in the age of the Internets…Let’s be honest, who actually knows the name of the Leave Britney Alone ranter:

Michael Richards, better known as Cosmo Kramer, lost it one sad, sad night at the Laugh Factory in 2006. Real? A Joke? Racist? We report. You decide. Or something:

Henry Rollins – America Is Under Attack. In the grand tradition of musicians making political statements, Henry Rollins goes absolutely nuts on everyone who is screwing up America.

Keeping in the spirit of our medium, we present to you another CNBC correspondent, a dweeby looking man named Dennis Kneale who–bless his sad, small brain–realized he could call bloggers Digital Dickweeds on air and get away with it. Of course we later learned that the whole thing was an act–perhaps he wasn’t as stupid as he looked and sounded–meant to attract viewers and the all important ratings. Keep it classy Dennis:

We’ll close with a fictional rant, by one Howard Beale (played by Peter Finch), in the masterpiece 1976 film Network, written by Paddy Chayefsky and directed by Sidney Lumet. He was, Mad As Hell, And He Wasn’t Going To Take It Anymore:

Want more? Check out YouTube playlists dedicated to ‘Meltdowns caught on tape.’

We had to update this classic collection after NBC pulled the YouTube version of the ten best pranks on Dwight of The Office:

The Taco Bell Chihuahua has passed away:

The Taco Bell chihuahua was a popular advertising figure and mascot, voiced by Carlos Alazraqui, and developed by TBWA and used by Taco Bell, which is a division of Kentucky, United States-based Yum! Brands. The Chihuahua is a breed commonly associated with Mexico, as are the tacos the restaurant serves. At least two dogs were used as models: the original was named Dinky, but was replaced shortly thereafter by a dog named Gidget. Dinky and a dog named Taco would also be stand-ins for Gidget.

Full Story: http://www.davecarrollmusic.com/story… – In the spring of 2008, Sons of Maxwell were traveling to Nebraska for a one-week tour and my Taylor guitar was witnessed being thrown by United Airlines baggage handlers in Chicago. I discovered later that the $3500 guitar was severely damaged. They didnt deny the experience occurred but for nine months the various people I communicated with put the responsibility for dealing with the damage on everyone other than themselves and finally said they would do nothing to compensate me for my loss. So I promised the last person to finally say no to compensation (Ms. Irlweg) that I would write and produce three songs about my experience with United Airlines and make videos for each to be viewed online by anyone in the world. United: Song 1 is the first of those songs. United: Song 2 has been written and video production is underway. United: Song 3 is coming. I promise. Follow me at http://twitter.com/DaveCarroll . Video Produced by Curve Productions of Halifax, http://www.curveproductionsinc.com.

DJ Morgoth is an excellent mashup creator and DJ based in Germany. He runs an awesome night called Mashup Your Bootz.

He made this great mashup, so I made a video of it for him.

Nirvana – Smells Like Teen Spirit

versus

Rick Astley – Never Gonna Give You Up

After addressing the audience, Jackson went into his routine. Wearing black pants, leather penny loafers and a single white rhinestone glove, Jackson snapped a fedora to his head and struck a pose—his right hand on his hat and his left leg bent. Throwing the hat aside, Jackson lip-synched to “Billie Jean”. Then, during a musical interlude, the singer executed a move which many claim to have sealed his status as a pop icon. Gliding backwards, Jackson performed the moonwalk, before spinning on his heels and landing en pointe. It was the first time Jackson had performed the moonwalk in public, having practiced it in his kitchen prior to the show.

The program was watched by 50 million people and earned Jackson an Emmy nomination. With the performance Jackson reached a new audience and increased the sales of Thriller, which eventually became the biggest selling album in the world. The day after the show aired, Jackson was called by his childhood idol Fred Astaire who commended the singer. Another childhood idol, Sammy Davis Jr., later received Jackson’s black sequined jacket, having admired it during the performance.

Gizmodo brings us this gem – “Idiots Want Robots to Draw Ads On the Moon’s Surface”

It’s one giant leap for robot-kind. New Shadow Shaping technology creates images on the Moon that can be seen from Earth. Robots are used to create several small ridges in the lunar dust over large areas that capture shadows and shape them to form logos, domains names, memorials or even portraits. Talk about the Man in the Moon! You can even carve your initials in a heart to impress your sweetheart.

The advertising potential is mind-boggling. Never in history have companies been able to penetrate every market on Earth, reach every person on the planet, and touch them at an emotional level only possible with the beauty of the Moon on a starlit night. Twelve billion eyeballs looking at your logo in the sky for several days every month. And since there is no atmosphere on the Moon, the images last for thousands of years.

“Finally dependency on government to travel beyond Earth is over,” says inventor David Kent Jones. “This new commercial incentive will turbo charge space technology development. Shadows are just the beginning; eventually robots will be planting crops on other planets.”

Beginning July 20, 2009, the fortieth anniversary of man’s first step on the Moon, exclusive licensing for this patent pending technology is publicly available. Moon Publicity is accepting bids from accredited investors and companies for 44 lunar regions until October 20, 2009. You could license moon-imaging technology potentially worth a fortune in advertising value for about the cost of an SUV. Minimum bids start as low as $46,000. For more information visit MoonPublicity.com.